Times, They are a Changin

I’ve been thinking about change a lot lately. No, not the random pennies I find in my pocket from time to time, but life changes. There has been a considerable amount of change in my life over the last year and while I am excited about it all, it has also been weird and in some ways difficult. In many ways these changes have been about moving forward and growing up, about trusting that God will provide and trusting others.

A bit over a year ago my friend, Jonathan, made a now infamous video of me (I may attach this on the blog one day, but I am not currently ready for that level of comedic exposure). It was a comedic response to my bungling ways in the area of romantic relationships. I am not suave. I am rarely cool. Tact is not necessarily my forte. Yet time and time again I had lumbered forward like Grawp (HPOotP) in my awkward way. Anyhow, this video made its way onto the computer screen of a lovely woman who I am proud to call my fiancee. Christine and I met online, this is true, but it was through the meddlesome love of two friends that we were set up in the first place. We met in person some two months later at the wedding of one of the meddlesome friends in Indianapolis. We clicked right away (I think she has a thing for my awkward side) and by the end of the weekend we had decided to give long distance dating a try. The problem was, she lived in Ireland and I in Seattle. Well we made it work. Lots of phone calls, a bit of miscommunication here and there and some Transatlantic travel ended with Chrissy and I getting engaged in Seattle in May.

We Got Engaged!

In the midst of my relationship with Chrissy I was also determining where, when and if I was going to finally go to seminary. As many of you know I have talked about this for years. I have hemmed and hawed, procrastinating and blaming it on some reason or other. Finally, sitting on my couch one night some friends suggested I just do it. Why don’t I just apply and see what happens. I tend to be a pessimist about these things. I didn’t think I would get in. I did. I didn’t think I would get the financial aid to make it possible, but I did. I didn’t think my car would make it, it did. Throughout all of this I have seen the gracious hand of God. I certainly don’t deserve to be here, but I am nonetheless. I am now living in St Louis, MO, attending Covenant Theological Seminary. I am taking summer Greek, remembering the thrill of learning new things because I want to learn them. It is hard, but hard in the same way that working out is hard when you are doing it but it feels so good later.

As I was packing up to leave Seattle just one month ago the reality that my life was forever changing began to dawn on me. Was I ready to say goodbye to the city I had come to love, to the church in which I had grown in so many ways, to family and friends, some of whom the reality is I may not see again this side of eternity. I stubbornly moved forward, hiding my emotions behind the flurry and stress of working up to the last minute, saying last minute goodbyes (to some people more than once), packing what I could take and getting rid of most of the rest of my possessions. When I finally left Seattle, with the blessing of good friends who graciously took care of many last minute loose ends for me, I looked in the rearview mirror and began to weep. I was exhausted. My life was changing. I realized I would never come back to Seattle the same person. The next time I go back I will be married. I will have been a student for more than half a year if not more. Some friends will have moved away. My church will have changed. Heck, the Alaskan Way Viaduct may not even be there and maybe I can take the lightrail from the airport. It won’t be the same.

As I contemplate the changes that have happened, both good and hard, as well as the multitude to come, I am ever more confident that I do indeed belong to Jesus. I am excited and nervous. Lets see what is coming next.